Be you

http://www.ted.com/talks/caroline_casey_looking_past_limits

Hey there,

I haven't been writing for a while. The truth is, I was scared. I was afraid that what I wrote, wouldn't be of value to you, my reader. I was worried that what I wrote was just an expression of the small me trying to teach people what they already knew. I wanted what I wrote for you to empower you, to inspire you, to motivate you. I wanted it to be a one-step solution to your many challenges. I wanted this blog to be perfect. 

Most of all, I wanted to be perfect. This past month has been a tremendous struggle for me. I realized how much I wanted to be perfect. All my life, I was afraid to appear weak, afraid to appear less smart than I was, less together than I should be. On the outside, I tried to be always a thumbs-up, everything's-great, I've-got-it-together girl. When things went wrong, I used to think (more often than not), 'what's wrong with these people?? What's wrong with me??'. I tried to control everything else outside of myself. But the truth is, I was hiding from myself. I was running away from who I am, not being able to face my life or imperfections for what they are out of fear of not being accepted. But you know what? The worst thing is, it didn't matter if my friends, family and colleagues, even strangers, loved me. I couldn't accept myself or love myself for who I was, much less receive their love and acceptance. The irony is that what I have written on this blog for the past year, did come from the bottom of my heart, from my understanding of what it means to live a happy life. Though sometimes it's easy to give advice but hard to heed your own!

But, you know, the Universe never gives you a lesson without teaching you how to overcome it. Sometimes, the lessons are glaringly obvious, staring at you in your face. Other times, they are hidden in tiny experiences, sometimes challenges, sometimes victories, waiting for you to assimilate them when you are finally ready. And I think I am finally ready. I am ready to really learn to be me. I am ready to put what I have learnt into true practice. I am ready to learn and accept who Rosanna really is. I am ready to discover what Rosanna really wants, really likes, how she really wants to live her life for what purpose she wants to bring to this amazing world. And for that, I am truly grateful. I am grateful to my friends (K, J, D, F, S, K, etc.) and various mentors (Katarina Phang, Christine Arylo, Kathleen Mulligan, Creig Crippen, Gina Devee, Brendon Burchard and all the inspiration videos and articles I have come across) for all the guidance that I have received on this journey, as well as everything else there will be to come. 

There will be no more following 'rules', no more imitation, no more trying to be someone else. For the Universe made all of us for a reason -- to be simply us and nothing less than we are. 

So, here's a promise. If you are facing the same challenge as I am and are ready to make a change, let us promise to be true to ourselves, no matter how hard the journey may seem. Life's too short to be someone else when you were made to be unapologetically, fabulously, beautifully YOU. And the best thing is, you won't be doing this alone, because I'll be walking next to you the entire way. <3 Have a good rest of the week, my friend =) 

xoxo
Rosanna